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The Marketer

While I first saw this skit performed at a Girl Scout camp, the original material can be found online. It works for both the Girl Scouts and the BSA.

This skit requires the Marketer, a Personal Assistant, a Girl Scout, and a BSA Scout.

skit notes

Just remember, if you're selling either of these products, it's a donation with food attached. Like for PBS fund drives.

[SCENE: An office room. The Marketer and the Personal Assistant are already on stage.]

Marketer: Okay, send in the next prospect.

PA: It looks like we have a Girl Scout.

[lets Girl Scout in, then PA leaves.]

Marketer: All right, what have you got for me?

Girl Scout: I have this great idea for a fundraiser. We could sell cookies!

Marketer: That sounds good, yeah. Girl Scout Cookies. We could have them in stores across the nation by...

Girl Scout: No no no, these won't be in stores.

Marketer: They won't?

Girl Scouts: They'll only be available for a short time.

Marketer: Limited time offer, yeah. But how will you sell them?

Girl Scout: We'll sell them direct.

Marketer: The personal touch, all right.

Girl Scout: We'll walk around the neighborhood.

Marketer: Like door-to-door salesmen?

Girl Scout: Exactly!

Marketer: With cookies.

Girl Scout: That's right.

Marketer: Oh-kay...

Girl Scout: And we'll have some tables outside of stores, too, for people to buy when they're shopping.

Marketer: Oh, like for a barbecue! The Fourth of July, picnics, pool parties...

Girl Scout: Oh no. Earlier in the year than that.

Marketer: Easter?

Girl Scout: February.

Marketer: February.

Girl Scout: Yes.

Marketer: So you're telling me that in the coldest month of the year, you want these little girls to go door-to-door, selling cookies that are only around for a month or two, and stand outside warm stores in the cold to sell cookies to people who have already gone grocery shopping?

Girl Scout: Yes!

Marketer: [sighs] Sure. Yeah, you know what, I'll sign off on it. Girl Scout Cookies, coming to a neighborhood near you. All right, head on out.

[Girl Scout leaves and PA returns]

Marketer: Well, that was odd. Who's up?

PA: Looks like we have a representative from the BSA up next.

Marketer: Ooh, good old Scouting! What have you got for me? Tents? Backpacks? Swiss Army knives?

[BSA Scout jumps in]

BSA Scout: [excitedly] POPCORN!

[Marketer groans]

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