Camp Winton Songbook
skit notes
Just remember, if you're selling either of these products, it's a donation with food attached. Like for PBS fund drives.
[SCENE: An office room. The Marketer and the Personal Assistant are already on stage.]
Marketer: Okay, send in the next prospect.
PA: It looks like we have a Girl Scout.
[lets Girl Scout in, then PA leaves.]
Marketer: All right, what have you got for me?
Girl Scout: I have this great idea for a fundraiser. We could sell cookies!
Marketer: That sounds good, yeah. Girl Scout Cookies. We could have them in stores across the nation by...
Girl Scout: No no no, these won't be in stores.
Marketer: They won't?
Girl Scouts: They'll only be available for a short time.
Marketer: Limited time offer, yeah. But how will you sell them?
Girl Scout: We'll sell them direct.
Marketer: The personal touch, all right.
Girl Scout: We'll walk around the neighborhood.
Marketer: Like door-to-door salesmen?
Girl Scout: Exactly!
Marketer: With cookies.
Girl Scout: That's right.
Marketer: Oh-kay...
Girl Scout: And we'll have some tables outside of stores, too, for people to buy when they're shopping.
Marketer: Oh, like for a barbecue! The Fourth of July, picnics, pool parties...
Girl Scout: Oh no. Earlier in the year than that.
Marketer: Easter?
Girl Scout: February.
Marketer: February.
Girl Scout: Yes.
Marketer: So you're telling me that in the coldest month of the year, you want these little girls to go door-to-door, selling cookies that are only around for a month or two, and stand outside warm stores in the cold to sell cookies to people who have already gone grocery shopping?
Girl Scout: Yes!
Marketer: [sighs] Sure. Yeah, you know what, I'll sign off on it. Girl Scout Cookies, coming to a neighborhood near you. All right, head on out.
[Girl Scout leaves and PA returns]
Marketer: Well, that was odd. Who's up?
PA: Looks like we have a representative from the BSA up next.
Marketer: Ooh, good old Scouting! What have you got for me? Tents? Backpacks? Swiss Army knives?
[BSA Scout jumps in]
BSA Scout: [excitedly] POPCORN!
[Marketer groans]