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You Need a Tie

This skit is set in the desert, and is a little bit absurdist.

This requires a Person, three Tie Salesmen, and a Maitre d'.

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Person: [gasping] Water! I need water!


Tie Salesman #1: Sir! Would you like to buy a tie? This one would look so good on you!


Person: I want water, not a tie! [moves on]


Tie Salesman #2: Sir! We're having a tie sale. Would you like to buy a nice tie for a great price?


Person: I'm dying of thirst, and you want to sell me a tie? [moves on]


Tie Salesman #3: Sir! I have these fine silk ties at reasonable prices. Would you care to look at my stock?


Person: Sheesh! What kind of people sell ties in the middle of the desert to thirsty people? [looks to the distance] An oasis! I'm saved! [scrambles over] Sir! Please! I would like to buy a glass of water!


Maitre d': I'm sorry, sir, but you can't enter this restaurant without a tie.

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